I WISH!

I’ve been watching way too many crocodile and shark videos on YouTube recently. 

I love both dearly and I’ve never really looked upon crocodiles as that scary until watching the videos of when someone is foolishly kayaking somewhere like Australia and a ‘saltie’ comes out of nowhere. 

Seeing as Rachael told me that The Frogs go for a dip by Boscombe Pier every Saturday and that I had come across a video that a scuba diver had filmed under the pier, I joined Rachael as far as the beach before she went out to join the group and I went off to see if there’s much I could film with no snorkel or scuba-diving gear and just my goggles and a thick plastic envelope designed to make my phone compatible for such aquatic delights. 

I was very fortunate and cosmically blessed to have been able to obtain such footage of lush different colours of greenery that look so haunting as well as mesmerizing and of course, some small fish, crabs and a crab that must’ve been half the size of my hand… and my hands….in my opinion...are massive! 

To add to my fears from watching croc videos is a creature that I definitely have very every right to fear….and that…..ladies….gents and non-binaries…is the poisonous weever fish… especially as Rachael told me that one of The Frogs got stung by one yesterday in Branksome Chine! 

On the other hand, wearing sandals in the sea isn’t as easy as I thought they would be so when I joined Rachael, her friend and her admirer Dave and the other Frogs…. I went back to taking risks and left my sandals behind. 

At least I know now that I can purchase aqua shoes in size 12 for £10 at Boscombe Pier when I receive my next instalment of benefits on the 21st. 

Seeing as Rachael and I will be in a river in nearby Tuckton tomorrow… I doubt there’s anything to fear there apart from perhaps mosquitoes and if REALLY lucky…. the elusive adder. 

Oh…and we will be …wait for it….kayaking! 

Who knows? 

At least anxiety in this context… is ‘spider sense’!! 

When I rejoined forces with Rachael... I was also fortunate to see a school of tiny garfish but wasn’t quick enough to film them seeing as I’m not always able to ‘swipe left’ on a touchscreen covered by thick plastic. 

Oh well… you get what you pay for and in regards to that…. Rachael has now bought a pair of snorkels and masks for our next swimming adventure together. 

Would that be sufficient enough for ‘Gadget Girl’ though? 

I strongly doubt it as since I arrived home, I had been searching for affordable underwater drones, underwater remote controlled vehicles and any underwater video hacks but with no success. 

I suppose this is the cosmos reminding me to keep to my day job as a singer/songwriter and producer and it’s not like I’m going to take up underwater photography or videography as a full-time hobby so I’ll make do with what I’ve already got! 

Plus, it’s refreshing to now be able to go swimming in the morning whenever I feel like it and I was also able to have a sound sleep without any more interruptions from having a blocked ear. 

Everything just takes time for my body to adjust to again… even after the lockdown.

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