I know what this is!
The universe is just making sure that all is balanced again.
I had such a lovely, beautiful day yesterday that I can now accept today for being almost the opposite.
I am sure I am just being my ratty, sulking self as I had hoped to watch the film I’ve been wanting to watch for a while now…but couldn’t.
That was going to be my excuse for chillin’ out and having some ME time before getting on with responsibilities for other people.
Obviously, spontaneous family commitments should always come first but then…. I suppose the cosmos knows how I am truly feeling within my own subconsciousness…. So, I actually feel blessed to have done some sibling bonding instead.
I’ve been waking up around 6:30 in the past few days to go to the bathroom and then it’s back to bed …then up officially at around 8:30.
Probably because I’ve been mentioning and contemplating following an Ayurvedic lifestyle again to get in tune with nature but I will have to consider what I can do in my room around that time that’s NOT too loud or will make a noise so that I don’t wake up the others.
However, there are so many good factors to waking up at 6:30 if only I could be bothered!
One would be like I have mentioned already….
Waking up when the sun and all the sentiment beings are awake...the other would be to have time to drink lukewarm water and sort out my biological interior network and then the main one would be….
I will probably feel very awake and most likely…. more creative and proactive for the rest of the day.
As well as not being so pessimistic too perhaps?
Well, there’s always tomorrow to give that a shot…and in regards to that.… I already have some commitments that I need to fulfil so… I shall allow myself to only have a day off this week…TODAY!
I have today and tomorrow morning and afternoon to decide which seven Thai songs I shall be performing end of this month and in August for the local World of Love Festival before submitting them to the organiser who will forward them on to the sound engineer.
Let’s hope that the backing tracks on my iPad will work again like they did yesterday!
At least there will be a plan B this time but it always helps to reduce anxiety when one knows who the sound engineer is ….and when you have worked with them before!
Obviously, I’m getting more and more anxious about this because I was asked last Wednesday if I would like to perform at the event and then we discussed this further last Saturday.
At least I have decided that I will mix them up with some country, pop, dance, old skool, and perhaps one of my own...as long as they are audience friendly of course!
I may as well strike the iron whilst it’s hot and start rehearsing them from today as well!
My second main priority is writing the press release for next single ‘Mesmerize Me’ but part of me is wondering what the point is... When I haven’t done any research into who to submit the song and press release to.
Fortunately, Ant And I have virtual meetings via zoom every Monday and Thursday so there is some hope after all.
I was feeling rough and slightly bitter when I started writing this earlier today….but as these memoirs are a way of me ‘speaking to someone’ daily and giving me the chance to express everything and anything…. THAT itself…. is all the therapy I need!
Funny really...because before I transitioned…. I would’ve turned my nose up at expressing myself this way and I have no idea why!